I Have Breast Cancer

I am not much of a writer. I rarely post anything on Facebook. I don't have a Twitter or Pinterest account. I'm pretty quiet and private about most things in my life. But I felt I needed to document the journey I am about to embark upon.

You see, on January 17th I was diagnosed with breast cancer. It's taken me a while to actually say that out loud and I assure you that it is becoming more and more of a reality as I am scheduled for surgery this coming week.

Let me rewind a little. So last year I turned 40 and I can't pinpoint exactly when I started feeling some odd sensations in my right breast. But something told me it wasn't right. I had a female doctor visit scheduled in December so I figured I'd discuss it with her. She couldn't feel anything but since I was now 40, she suggested I get a mammogram.

The day of the mammogram I immediately knew there was a problem when the doctor asked for more images of my right breast. He went on to say there was some suspicious calcifications that needed to be biopsied. So I had the biopsy on Monday, January 16th. The next day I got the call confirming cancer and by Wednesday I was in the breast surgeon's office discussing plans for a mastectomy.

Mastectomy?? But I had no tumors, just calcifications so can't they just give me something to get rid of it? That's how uneducated and ignorant I was about this deadly disease. My diagnosis at this time was Stage 0, non-invasive DCIS (ductal carcinoma in situ). If you're going to get breast cancer, this is the least invasive with Stage 4 being the most invasive and my understanding, incurable.

The doctor also wanted me to get an MRI to see if there was more behind the scenes in the lymph nodes. I had never had an MRI before and really didn't know what to expect. Whoa! Was it rough. If you have the slightest bit of claustrophobia, it will set your anxiety off!

My anxiety was the least of my worries because the MRI detected a suspicious lymph node which meant another biopsy. And then there was more bad news....at least one lymph node was diseased which meant my Stage 0 cancer quickly became Stage 2A, invasive ductal carcinoma.

So I went from a healthy 40 year old to one who needed to educate herself quickly about a disease I knew nothing about. A disease that requires an oncological surgeon for the mastectomy, an oncologist (cancer doctor), a radiologist for radiation treatments, and a plastic surgeon for reconstruction. I don't even have a primary care physician!

The plastic surgeon was the most difficult to find and it took 3 tries but the third was the charm. Trouble is, he practices at Barnes while the oncological surgeon is at MO Bap. Ideally, the oncological surgeon will do the mastectomy and the plastic surgeon will slip in afterwards and start the reconstruction process by implanting a tissue expander. All of this can be done in one surgery if your surgeons are on staff at the same hospital. Unfortunately for me, I will have to have two surgeries.

On Thursday, March 1st, I will have a mastectomy at MO Bap and then the following Monday, the 5th I will have a tissue expander implanted at Barnes. By the way, if you google on breast tissue expander, there's a YouTube video of a breast reconstruction. Good gracious! There isn't anything you can't find on the Internet. I'm sure of it.

I realize this is a lot to absorb and trust me, I left a lot out too. I wish I would have started journaling this roller coaster ride sooner, but it's been tough trying to keep up with my already busy schedule but then to add doctor appts after doctor appts.

So while turning 40 has been a curse, it has also been a blessing. While I have breast cancer, it was caught early enough that it is curable. I will be fine. By God's grace, I will beat this. By God's grace, my family will be closer than ever. By God's grace, my marriage will be stronger on the other side of this. By God's grace, I will come to appreciate friendships more than ever and create new ones. By God's grace, I will see life through His eyes and cherish every moment.